any smoker knows that turning away a cigarette is one of the most challenging tasks ever. i have been smoking for almost 20 years. that is disgusting considering i'm only going to be 31. i have recently been considering a 3rd attempt to quit. my sister tried chantix (read about that here) and it has been determined that i will never try to quit using that method. so.... what do i try? this past wednesday i was home sick from work with this horrible cough that should be gone by now and it's not. wednesday i felt so awful i couldn't smoke. until about 4pm. i wanted to smoke all day, but hurt so badly that i just couldn't do it. since then, i haven't been able to just not smoke. it pisses me off. they are slowly killing me and i do it anyway. i know that i need to replace that hobby, if you will, with something more rewarding that won't ultimately kill me. something that i can do instead of smoking. the easy thing would be food. i can't turn to food or i'll get fat. then i'll have to lose weight and that's equally as hard as quitting smoking.
this weekend has come and gone. feeling horrible makes for an unpleasant 2 days off. we're very excited for next weekend. we've decided that in order for gabby to get to know her closest family members, she'll have to go stay with them for a weekend a month. her nana and pop pop are about 2 hours away and we don't see them enough. so one weekend per month (if possible) we'll be driving goo to their house on a friday and picking her up on sunday. it's great for us to have the alone time, as well. christian and i haven't had a date in months. baby sitters are so incredibly expensive and we are so much happier being at home that we just haven't made time for each other. i cannot wait for friday! so much so that the week will probably drag.
so.... here's to 1 day closer to the weekend.